Today I told my boss about how my father had his tonsils out because his brother's headphones didn't fit. This was back when doctor's used surgeries like tonsilectomies to make a killing. Tom, my uncle, had a hearing test at school and failed because the headphones kept falling off his head...which is hard to believe seeing as my uncle has a rather large head now. My Dad was only 6 or 7 and when the doctor checked out Tom he said everything looked find but just to be safe they might want to take out his tonsils. My Dad, sitting quietly in a chair in the room since he was too young to be left unaccompinied, became a victim of the doctor's greed when he said, "we might as well do his while we're at it."

Now doctor's are so scared of malpractice suits they would never do such a thing. They do give you lots of drugs. Sara is sick and they gave her steroids and 4 other kinds of meds. Now she's seen 3 doctors and still feeling like shit. I make it a point to avoid doctor's at all cost...even though for over a year my parents forked out 300 dollars a month just to keep me insured while I sought employment. Now that my insurance has kicked in at work, I finally made my first appointment with my new insurance on December 22. It makes no difference to me that it's cloas to Christmas since I won't be getting that many days off.

Work is going ok...although this week seems to be screaming at me already. On Sunday Sara and I went to see Chronicles of Narnia and there was a baby crying practically the whole time. Then today Stacy, my supervisor, brought her 18 month old sick son to our meeting and he was loud. I think someone's trying to send me a strong message...DON'T HAVE SEX EVER...YOU MIGHT END UP WITH ONE OF THOSE! Other than that I have felt somewhat snubbed by Stacy who seems to take credit for things I do well and blame me when something goes wrong although sometimes she is mostly to blame. But it could be a lot worse.

The church service on Sunday was moving. Tis the season of advent and this week was love. We had the moravian love feast which is a beautiful candle lit service where we have apple juice, coffee and love buns while singing Christmas Carols. This service is always nice but I found the morning service more thought provoking. I guess it's weird that I go to a Baptist church and don't consider myself a Christian. But often times I can gain something by going to Oakhurst...and that's why I go.

This week Kate Hawk was the liturgist and said some very moving things. Her son died in 2001 when he was 16 of Addison's disease. She told a story about when she was 16 wanting to fill her car up with gas to hang out with some friends...she couldn't find any money...and then she found some coins on top of her father's dresser. She took them and filled up her tank. She found out when she came home that the silver coins were collector's silver dollars. Her Dad was very angry...then she cried and said how sorry she was and was ridden with guilt. And her father said that she was more precious to him than any coins. Then she told a story of when her and her husband were divorcing and she took her kids to a block party. She gave Thomas 5 dollars to go buy food...he was 8 amd he disappeared. She and others looked around for him and he finally showed up an hour or two later. She asked him if he had gotten some dinner...he seemed out of it and said, "dinner?" He had a brown bag in his hand. He opened it and gave her a goudy pin and said that he bought it for her because he had to be the man of the house now because if he wasn't there would be no one to buy her pretty things. They were both stories of love. I think of love in my own life and I see it in examples like these.

Bina and Sara throwing me Sarah Appreciation Night. My Mom buying me Christmas Tree little debbie's at the grocery store. People and relationships are more precious than anything material. It's unfortunate that people don't treat everyone with respect and love like they were their own friends and blood relatives...overtaken by greed a doctor will take an innocent healthy boy's tonsils out...the only good of that is ice cream.

Here's one more cool thing Kate Hawk read that I'm just going to post here:

I. There is a spirit which I feel

Can I, imprisoned, body-bounded, touch
The starry robe of God, and from my soul,
My tiny Part, reach forth to God's great Whole,
And spread my Little to the infinite Much,
When Truth forever slips from out my clutch,
And what I take indeed,
I do but doleIn cupfuls from a rimless ocean-bowl
That holds a million, million million such?
And yet, some Thing that moves among the stars,
And holds the cosmos in a web of law,
Moves too in me: a hunger, a quick thaw
Of soul that liquefies the ancient bars,
As I, a member of creation, sing
The burning oneness binding everything.